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I`m really wanting to sit and watch a movie with my boyfriend. Can anyone recommend a good boyfriend?
It`s not a mental breakdown if the police wasn`t called.
Is "drunk" an emotion? Because if it is, I am feeling SUPER emotional right now...
Texting totally changes your perception of how long stoplights are.
You guys remember back before Google when we would just sit around and wonder about sh!t ...?
You can`t fight Destiny. Because if you try to fight Destiny, then you have to fight the bouncers and the rest of the strippers too...
Saw a Mime doing his gig. I reached into my purse and pretended to throw money in his hat.
What flickering lights mean: 1% electrical problems. 99% demons.
Get ahead of myself. Sometimes I
Had another daydream where I`m doing the mexican hat dance and CIA guys watching me from satellites are dancing along in their control room
who`s smart idea wus it to name a monkey Donkey Kong??
Sometimes you run into people who just make your day more bearable. Those people are called bartenders.
If your father is poor, Its your fate, but if your father-in-law is poor, then its your fault!
On the 14th of December I`m going to call people and say "7 Days" then hang up...
If we`re in a situation where I am the "voice of reason," then we are in a very very bad situation.