Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
No matter how busy a guy is, he can always take out a moment from his busy life to just stop and stare at a beautiful girl.
If you see me drinking coffee from a to-go cup in public after 3 pm, that coffee is booze in disguise.
Ironically, Internet was made to save our time.
Girls don`t dress for boys, they dress for themselves... If girls dressed for boys, they`d just walk around naked all the time.
Test drove a Jaguar today. Very fast but the ride was pretty bumpy and the saddle kept falling off. I also think he tried to bite me.
If a cannibal is late to dinner do they give him the cold shoulder?
joined a nudist colony last week ... the first few days were the hardest!
I guess not everyone at this grocery store is as comfortable with my nudity as I am. ;)
Can you do me a favour? Stand in front of my car, I need to test my brakes.
Decided to get in touch with my feminine side today... I made myself a sandwich!
The Roomba vacuum cleaner just beat me to a piece of popcorn I dropped on the floor & this is how the war against the machines begins.
Monday :`( Tuesday :-( Wednesday :- Thursday :-/ Friday :-| Saturday :-) Sunday B-)
If it weren`t for marriage,,, men would spend their lives thinking they had no faults at all.
Nobody looks back at their life and remembers the nights they got plenty of sleep.
I hate fake people...especially the ones at the mall advertising clothes in front of the stores