Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
There’s a wild side to EVERY innocent face.
On the bright side, I`m relieved we live in a society where we acknowledge that the people who make sandwiches are artists.
I like having an ex ...it gives me something to do on Facebook at 3 in the morning.
I can`t believe that it`s almost the year 2014 and I still have to bend down to pick stuff up.
Whenever I start to hate my job I think about the camera crew who has to follow the Kardashian’s 24/7.
In space they just call it "Jam"
If life was easy, we wouldn`t need alcohol.
Statistically, I`ve come to the conclusion that I`m going to hell in multiple religions.
Life is all about perspective. The sinking of the Titanic was a miracle to the lobsters in the ship`s kitchen.
In the 60`s we took LSD to make the world look wierd. Now the world is weird and we take Prozac to make it look normal.
I wouldn`t consider myself someone that litters but I do turn on my windshield wipers while im driving down the road to get rid of that useless flyer some idiot put on my car when I quickly run into the store.
Thanks for the free weekend offer E-Harmony but my wife said I can`t use it.
Love your enemies; after all, you made them!
Indecisiveness is just mental constipation.
The only difference between McDonald`s and my work is McDonald`s has only got one clown running the show.