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My method of going "offline" in FB chat is to simply ignore you.
I feel like being that guy that gets upset when people use the term "straight A`s". "Fabulously flawless A`s" sounds much better.
Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies.
Is it too early for extra nog in my egg?
Imagine how freaked out the first human must of been on the first sneeze.
Jehovah`s Witnesses, Improving my hiding skills since 1974.
Never cry over spilt milk. It could`ve been whiskey.
The police never think its as funny as you do.
Conspiracy theorists are all so dumb that I suspect they`ve been planted by a secret organization to distract us from what`s really going on
If you touch your phone in the right places, a pizza will arrive at your door.
I`m not sure how many problems I have because math is one of them.
I wish I had the balls to be a juggler.
Is anyone going to tell America`s funniest videos about YouTube?
How do you start a rave in Ethiopia? Glue a piece of toast to the ceiling
They said money can`t by happiness. But it can buy tattoos, car parts, and beer. What else could we need?