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I have just one word for beautiful women with questionable morals, poor decision making skills and an insatiable sex drive ..."Hi"
I don`t mind sharing the highway with other people. I just wish they`d use the part behind me.
Behind every beautiful song is a person who really shouldn`t sing it out loud in public
My internet went down last week...so I talked to my family....thank goodness the internet came back
CNN needs to reevaluate the use of Breaking News. Perhaps "Latest Speculative News" or "We Really Don`t Know Shit" would work. CNN call me.
I`m glad I`ve got boobs. The last thing I need is people making eye contact with me
Don`t waste your time being difficult. Put forth a little more effort and be impossible.
Why am I always right but people still ignore me...?
"They are more afraid of you than you are of them." -people who know even less about me than they do about bears
I`ve found that nowadays most people don`t like holding hands in public. Especially if you don`t know them.
I bet if there were little basketball hoops above every garbage can, littering would greatly decrease.
It`s not that I CAN`T be good, it`s that I`m SOOOOO much better at being BAD!!!
If I ever go missing and there’s a big search party out looking for me, you can save time by not looking at any gyms.
Black Friday at my house consist of pants 100% off
If whores, witches, ghosts and hobo`s show up on my doorstep, I can only assume it`s Halloween because our family reunion was in July....