Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I wish my mind had a delete button.
Legally,It´s questionable. Morally,It´s disgusting. Personally,I like it.
You want to piss off a woman? Hide one shoe.
All my biological clock does, is let me know when it`s time to eat again
My Viagra addiction was the hardest time of my life.
I could of sworn my pillow`s a hairdreeser...coz I always wake up with the craziest hairstyles!! :D
Facebook should just change it`s name to "People You May Want to Avoid."
Your silent treatment should be accompanied by a disappearing act.
The guy behind me honked a nanosecond after the light turned green. So I put on my flashers and here I sit, tweeting about the whole thing
Liam Neeson trained Batman, Obi Wan, and Darth Vader. He is both Aslan and Zeus…and he punches wolves. Why would you kidnap his family?
Netflix would be by far the best dating site. "Here are 9 other singles in your area who have also watched Pokemon for 12 straight hrs"
can´t find Sesame Street on my GPS. Can you tell me how to get there?
Can I get likes for no reason?
I like to finish other people’s sentences because my version is better.
If you want to go running with me, you`d better be prepared to walk a lot.