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I love the show Gotham....OBSESSED!!! But they constantly have the Twitter hashtag #gotham in the corner of the screen, and I`m always thinking..."No I don`t have ham! But I want ham." Sometimes I miss parts of the showing thinking about the fact that I don`t have ham..... Obviously I need to have ham on the menu every Monday night. #noidontgotham
Difference between men and women: Women can change their mind whenever they want. Men can change their mind whenever the woman wants.
The amount of times I`ve had to say no to the Adobe Updater has totally prepared me to be a parent.
Can’t find your children? Try turning off the wifi. They appear suddenly.
You call it "Blacking Out" I call it a "Surprise Nap"
How many people actually tell everyone that you said Hi.
The only F word out a woman`s mouth that scares me is "fine."
I got a little package in the mail today. For some reason it just reminded me of my ex.
Don`t mistake my middle finger as an offer.
Breasts are like model trains. They were originally meant for children but grown men always want to play with them.
is procastinating now. Don´t see why I should put it off.
I just threw up my weekend.
Immature: A word boring people use to describe fun people.
gone fishing ¸.·´¯`·.¸><((((º>
If you love something, feed it so much that it get’s too fat for anyone else to want.