Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Just because it`s a bad idea, doesn`t mean it`s not going to be a good time.
You know it`s time to clean your screen when you start confusing dirt with punctuation.
Friend: Hey that`s a great truck. what kinda engine? Me: [rubbing the hood] it`s got a truck engine
"Open Mike Night" sounded like a lot of fun until I realised I`d been invited to an autopsy.
He died doing what he loved: telling me I`m overreacting.
Wake up, kids! Bees can`t even read, much less spell. IT`S A SCAM!
So when is this `old enough to know better` suppose to kick in ?
I look forward to paying off all my debt so I can get back to just being broke.
If tomatoes are a fruit, then ketchup is a smoothie.
Just dropped off some film to be processed. More on this story as it develops.
Who did you vote for?? Clinton ? Trump ? Vodka
I`ve started an exercise program. I do 20 sit-ups each morning. That may not sound like a lot, but you can only hit that snooze button so many times.
I wouldn’t pay for a personal trainer, but I would pay someone to just knock unhealthy food out of my hands.
My sex life is like a Ferrari ... I don`t have a Ferrari
Kids maybe a gift..... But I like playing with the box it came in.