Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I would order delivery more often, but I just can`t stand lowering the drawbridge.
Life is very funny, if you take the time to watch it.
Weather forecast for tonight: dark
I was so disturbed by hearing about all the people using marijuana today that I almost dropped my deep-fried Snickers bar into my 48oz Coke.
One minute without you feels like 60 seconds.
Sure, I can speak Spanish... "Margarita!"
I hope to get to the point in my life where I`m not excited about finding change on the ground.
If you receive an e-mail that says: ``FREE JUSTIN BIEBER CONCERT TICKETS`` Don`t open it! It may contain free Justin Bieber concert tickets.
Roses are red, violets are blue, If your parents told you you`re beautiful, they`re lyin to you..:D
It takes patience to listen, it takes skill to pretend youβre listening.
I hate taking down Christmas decorations just to put up Halloween decorations...
I add "Drink Beer" to my weekend to-do list so I know I`ll at least get one thing done.
I`m at the facebook saloon, drinking all night long
Example of the difference between `You`re`and `Your`: 1. "You`re nuts" = "You are nuts" 2. "Your nuts" = "What about my nuts?"
I`m not getting married till Pizza Hut allows gift registry.