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Jesus is coming.... look busy
They should create an app that makes your cellphone go “ahhhhhhhh” when you plug it in.
During Sex you burn as much calories as running 5 miles ... Who the f*ck runs 5 miles in 30 seconds.
i just accidentally used AOL online, im betting the workers there are celebrating and think they have a chance in the future. lol
I`ve found that the best web designers in the world are spiders.
I once peed a girl`s name in the snow, so don`t fcuking tell me I don`t know romance.
The wrong time to have a seizure is probably during a Harlem Shake Video.
Life gets a lot easier once you decide to become part of the problem.
A coworker just wrote "Retard" on the windshield of my car. It`s taken me over an hour to lick it off!
I was about to do something awesome, again, but I told myself “Enough is enough, that’s plenty of awesome for one day”
This bar doesn’t know it yet, but it’s about to be karaoke night.
I don`t call it lying down, I call it landscape mode.
I just called to get my credit score and I heard laughing in the background. Sounds like a cool place to work.
Hmmmmm,,,, Turns out all this time, I’ve been using a life couch instead of a life coach.
I used to question how much information was too much information. Joined Facebook, It`s much clearer now