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I don’t mean to alarm you but you know those people in your office that can’t work the fax machine? They’re driving home on the same roads.
Just pour the coffee and back away slowly.
Defeat....the feeling you get when you realize the "next" level is just as hard......
You should get at least 8 hours of beauty sleep... 9 if you`re an ugly bitch...
If I drank, I`d have a lot funnier status updates on Facebook than I do now. Well, at least I`d think they were funnier.
2015 and still no thieves interested in my identity.
Why do people ask "What were you thinking?" Obviouly, I thought I was going to get away with it!
Example of the difference between `You`re`and `Your`: 1. "You`re nuts" = "You are nuts" 2. "Your nuts" = "What about my nuts?"
I hate when its dark and your brain is all "you know what we haven`t thought about in a while ... demons."
What would I give the woman who has everything? Well, my phone number for a start.
Depending on how you look at it, half of 8 could be 4, 3, or 0.
I got a new marker today that smells like grapes. Thats why I`ve been so quiet.
Well, I`ve officially entered the, "Why did I come into this room?" phase of my life.
Intelligence is like underwear. It`s important that you have it but there`s no need to show it off.
Dear Cashier, you should stop giving me attitude and acting like you`re job is so complicated and stressful....Self-Checkout has proven that pretty much Anyone can do your job.