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I`m a spontaneous procrastinator
I made Creme Brulee today. More food should require the use of a blow torch.
Sometimes I wonder how people who don`t have kids get their TV remotes from the other side of the room.
What if there were no hypothetical questions?
Facebook has suggested that I POKE you.
There’s literally no way to know how many chameleons are in your house.
So many people are making history right now. but me, I`m deleting history from my browser.
Sometimes you have to flip out and go bat sh!t crazy to make a point.
I bought powdered water but I don`t know what to add to it.
You`re in your 20`s... you don`t have "haters"... you have "adults" that think you are "annoying"
News flash! someone just found Carmon Sandiego!
I`m pretty sure the phrase "sleep tight" originated in prison...
They always say "love makes the world go around"... They spelled beer wrong.
Whenever I hear someone call my name, my first instinct is to walk faster
48 states observe daylight savings time. The other two clock block.