Mobile App Coming Soon - Daily Silly Status

Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

Happy new years, my friends. Thanks for supporting the site, Ralf.
My Memory.....The Second shortest thing I have.
To all my Facebook friends. Have a happy St. Patrick`s day, and all the festivities this weekend. Stay safe, enjoy life, and if you by chance happen to find a bartender who is bad at math...give me a call :)
My moral compass must run on solar power because it never seems to work after dark.
Hey you know what will go good with all that beer you just drank? Social media and a camera phone!
People ask me why I don`t have any tattoos and I respond with, would you put a bumper sticker on a Ferrari?
All single ladies, stop saying you should just give up and get a cat. If no man wants you, don’t force an innocent cat to live with you.
That moment when you have so many things to do...So you decide to take a nap instead!
DO NOT expect a "Bless You" after your 3rd sneeze. Get that sh!t under control.
You can`t be late until you show up
I don`t care how loud I`m laughing, I`m having fun and you`re not.
My body needs a refresh button.
I hope daylight savings time doesnt throw me off my schedule of doing nothing.
My dance moves are somewhere between β€œdog being shocked by an electric fence” and β€œsquirrel crossing the road.”
RIGHT NOW YOU HAVE: 3 fingers behind your phone, your pinky tucked under for support and your scrolling with your thumb! LIKE if I’m right!!!!