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Just saw someone holding a sign that said "Honk 2 impeach Obama" You`d think the process to impeach a president would be more complicated
Word on the street is... Lol. Jk. I don`t go outside.
Is it a firm rule that you have to be an addict to check into rehab? Because that one in Malibu looks pretty nice.
If pigs could fly.. Would I be able to get high on bacon?
Sometimes I find myself envious of how well Waldo can hide..
It`s not so much that I have to work that bothers me...oh wait, yes it is.
I heard she was born naked!! That slut!
You know you`re fat when you run out of breath eating.
Don’t get me wrong. I totally hear what you’re saying…I just don’t care.
Well after 6 months of my girlfriend nagging, I finally did it, I lost 120lbs ... I`m sure gonna miss her.
Why don`t strip clubs do Black Friday? It would be the one place I would camp out to go in.
Not only am I a master of suspense, but I...
Robots can do anything we set their mind to
There are no absolutes in this world. Except vodka.
Volleyball is just a more intense game of "Don`t let the balloon touch the floor"