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At first, I had my doubts about using autocorrect. But my new phone probed me wrong. PROVED DAMNIT! PROVED!
I just burned 1200 calories ... I forgot the pizza in the oven again.
FYI : My post aren`t directed at anyone in particular...so should anyone be offended by them, I say if the shoe fits ... Wear It!!!!!
I stay a bit overweight because it wouldn`t be fair to all the skinny people if I were this attractive, intelligent, funny and thin. It`s a public service really.
If I ask my dad to take a picture of me with my phone there is a 99% chance it will be a video of me yelling "It`s the button on the left!"
I`ve said it before and I`ll say it again, if you drive a Nissan but don`t call it Liam then what is even the point of you
4 out of 5 voices in my head think the other voice is a douche.
The only F word out a woman`s mouth that scares me is "fine."
I react to "Someone has tagged a photo of you..." in the same way I react to a doctor saying, "Your test results came back..."
I saw this homeless guy talking to himself and I was like, "Who is he talking to?" then I thought "Who am I talking to?"
I love the phrase "boobie trapped" I mean, who doesn`t like to be trapped by boobies????
Why don`t you slip into something more comfortable, like a coma
I`ve decided to take some time off Facebook so I can focus on work and, ok, I`m back
I`m a very modest person, mostly because I`m awesome.
Kinda hard to believe not a single mutant at professor Xavier’s school had the power to heal a dude’s legs.