Daily Silly Status

when girls say bye .......... may be it means buy something for her.....

I love how when your watching a crime show and they have to tell you that "this is a reenactment" oh really? you mean you didn`t actually catch the murder on video?

Instructions for having an adventure: 1. Stand outside restaurant. 2. Wait for someone to ask if you`re the valet. 3. Say yes.

Some people want to get in shape before they go to a gym. Which is the equivalent of losing weight so you can go on a diet

I can take care of my drunk friends, so the responsibility of having children doesn`t worry me.

As long as everything is exactly the way I want it, I`m totally flexible

If watching the big-screen TV with your pants off and a bag of Doritos is wrong, then they shouldn`t have couches at this Best Buy.

Apparently “cheesecake & tacos” wasn’t the answer the interviewer was looking for when he asked me what my weaknesses are.

I`ve decided to add more positivity in my life. So, now when I say someone`s an a@#hole, I qualify it with......... but he`s really good at it...........and I`m positive about that!

I bought powdered water but I don`t know what to add to it.

I just heard someone say "I can`t wait for 13/13/13" .....let`s take a moment and pray for this dumbass

I thinking about how im disgusted by holding a gas pump but yet, I have no problem drinking my beer from a cup that ten other people drank out of, and a backwash covered ping pong ball was just thrown into it after hitting a dirty a$$ garage floor??

If you heard twenty minutes of moaning from my bedroom that was just me trying to stand up.

I saw some ducks practicing their teenage girl faces at the pond today.

I just found a $100 bill laying on the floor in the checkout lane. I don`t even have to try to find out who lost it, because it`s the same color, and has the same picture on it as the one I lost 2 years ago!! WooHoo, talk about fate huh??!!