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It was awkward when she said, "And yet your feet are so big."
Always look out for #1. Don´t step in #2 either.
I love long legs.... Long sexy legs.....But not on a Spider, I hate long sexy legs on a Spider.
My life is like a romantic comedy expect there’s no romance and it’s just me laughing at my own jokes
The bat signal seems pretty useless if they need Batman during the day.
I took up the game of Golf recently. . .but I had too much trouble getting through that windmill.
Today I caught myself thinking of you and smiling... but it was because you had a booger in your nose the last time I saw you.
Nothing f*cks up your Friday like realizing that it`s only Tuesday
When I was young I was scared of the dark. Now when I see my electricity bill I am scared of the lights.
I think New York has reached the point where it can finally be called York.
I`m reaching the point where I really hope it`s not possible to be annoyed to death.
Don`t text me while I`m texting you. Now I have to go back and change my text.
F*ck you, regular cars that look like police cars. Also vice versa.
I just lost my mood ring, I don`t know how I feel about that.
ATMs should have built in breathalyzers. I would save so much money.