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You cant ask "What do you mean by that?" without sounding pissed off
It`s okay, Web MD. I don`t really know what`s wrong with me either.
It only takes a second to show a person how much you feel about them. The police call it indecent exposure, but whatever...
"This place needs to be sticky, wall to wall." - Every 2 year old with a Popsicle.
The most misinformed people think they know all the facts.
When all else fails… Pizza & Beer.
My bank is the worst. They`re charging me money for not having enough money in my account. Apparently, I can`t even afford to be broke.
WANTED: Someone to follow me around and whisper "You`re an adult" every few minutes.
If I look tired at the end of the day, it`s because I just spent eight solid hours looking busy.
I slept and woke up. (ok, lately this has become a major accomplishment in my life)
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend.......who`s in with me?
Hey Monday+?+(???) +?+
You can always tell if a guy masturbates a lot by looking at his hands. If you look closely, you’ll see a wedding ring.
What`s with this `running with scissors` bullsh!t? Why would you run with scissors? Are you that excited to cut paper?
Sleep is my drug, my bed is my dealer, and my alarm clock is police.