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If gas prices keep going up I`m cutting off the bottom of my car and I`m "Flintstoning" That mf!
Seems like Pizza Hut should be able to afford a house by now.
My Memory.....The Second shortest thing I have.
The real trouble with reality is that there´s no background music
If I truly posted what was on my mind ... I´d most likely be in a psychiatric hospital right now.
Old meaning of sorry. "I won`t do it again." New meaning of sorry. "Damn I got caught, next time I need to be more careful."
I love how in movies when someone types a really embarrassing secret they always accidentally send it to the whole school, and they also coincidentally have the phone number of everyone.
No one is ever bored enough to start studying.
If the shampoo and conditioner in her shower are not the same brand GET THE F*CK OUT, SHE`S A MAN!
Some mornings I feel like leaving my coffee until its cold enough that I can just pour it directly into my eyes.
I talk to myself because my answers are the only ones I accept
I wonder if anyone has watched Storage Wars and said, "Hey, that`s my stuff!"?
Every snack you make, every meal you bake, every bite you take, I`ll be watching you. - Dog
Millions of innocent coconuts are murdered each year so you can drink their nutritious blood you insensitive health freak
When ever I think about the past...It brings back so many memories