Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Feeling tired as you struggle to get through the day? There`s a nap for that.
Conspiracy theory for conspiracy theorists: Your conspiracy theories were planted by the government to distract you from real conspiracies.
This bulk box of peanuts I got from Costco tastes like styrofoam.
I remember, once upon a time... for about 2 seconds... about 13 years ago... I almost gave a damn.
I`m really good at making poor decisions. You`re my favorite so far.
Writing "Omg you guys are still friends after what she said about you???" on every group photo of girls I see on Instagram
Doing the moonwalk is the only way to look cool while wiping dog crap off your shoes.
Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place to have sex.
I can`t wait to find my soul mate so I can start sleeping on the couch.
Talking bout planets with my 8 yr old. He asked if you can just plow thru Uranus because it`s all gas. I cannot respond maturely.
Ohio - High in the middle, and round at the ends.
I always drink responsibility I make sure that someone is responsible for buying me drinks.
You are like that one crazy wheel on a grocery cart.
I kinda like zombies...but can we go ahead & decide whether they can run fast or just walk? ... my apocolypse plans depend on it ... thanks!
Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you`ll be really far away from me with your motivational nonsense.