Daily Silly Status

A friend doesn`t question your motive, they just keep their mouth shut and dig.

Whenever I’m bored I stop a stranger and ask “where am I?” and whatever they say I runaway screaming “Hahaha I’m a genius! I can teleport!”

So, I guess we’re just supposed to assume the number is 1-800-Ghostbusters?

The ‘poke’ button on Facebook should be replaced with a ‘slap’ button.

Honk if you are reading this.

I`ve noticed more and more little kids with cell phones and social networks. What does a kindergartner have to tweet about? "I`m getting better at drawing in the lines!" #cantwaitforstorytime

I just burnt my tongue on my food. It made me realise that it’s the ones we love that hurt us the most.

At least clean up the bathroom before taking your profile picture.

Studies confirm that smoking withdrawal (for me) can be fatal (for you).

Adding “and sh!t” to the end of a sentence to make it sound cooler and sh!t.

Did you ever stop to think that maybe vodka is addicted to ME?

I don’t understand shark movies I mean just get out of the water.

I want to live in a world where the Food Network delivers.

Sometimes I want to comment on a photo on Facebook but then I don’t wanna have to explain why I’m in your ‘Random Party Pics 08' album at 4am.

Why do people at home on TV have their pants on?