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Anyone who says sunshine brings happiness has never danced in the rain.
I just passed the local college and saw 3 very fit young ladies with very tight yoga pants walking to class...I have never been so motivated to return to college.
I have thought a lot about it and I am thrilled to announce that I have decided to never die.
Relationships are like batteries, they have a positive & a negative side. And you end up whacking your remote instead of changing them.
I`m really easy to get along with, once people learn to worship me.
How can it be considered stealing when the WiFi signal is trespassing in my house?
I’ve noticed the less open-minded someone is, the more open-mouthed they tend to be.
Donald Trump`s hair saw its shadow. We have six more weeks of protesting.
By thigh gap you mean the distance between the KFC and my mouth right.
How much time has to pass before grave robbing is considered archaeology?
If you want funny, get off Facebook and watch the news...
Do not worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow older it will avoid you.
Don`t hate me because I`m beautiful. Hate me because your man thinks I am.
Given enough coffee, I believe I could rule the world.
Building the city on rock and roll was probably the wrong move from an engineering perspective.