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If people are talking behind your back, then just fart.
liked homework better when it was called coloring.
Why can’t they make the whole week out of Saturdays?
Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?
Admit it...Life yould be boring without me.
I found out that middle age is were you finally get your head together and then your body starts falling apart
This by far is your most f*ck up idea ever ... I`ll be there in 10 minutes.
I`ll go to great lengths to scavenge other devices for batteries, before I will go out to buy new ones
Nothing like working out to make you feel like you deserve that burger and fries.
If you can´t read this, you´re illiterate.
I just got a piece of mail that says "open immediately" but I`m gonna wait a few minutes.
Sometimes, I`m offended at how easily offended some people get.
People who sit and talk while their pizza is gets cold gives me anxiety.
They say do what you love & the money will follow. I love doing nothing. We`ll see.
Common sense is like deodorant....The people who need it most never use it.