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If I had a time machine, I’d probably just use it so I wouldn’t have to throw out so many bananas.
Yes, your opinion matters ... But not to me.
I tend to say “I don’t know” when I’m too lazy to think.
It`s a beautiful day, think I`ll skip my meds and stir things up a bit.
She walked in & she had legs, legs that went on for days. Who knows where they went? They just kept wenting. - Why my mystery novel failed
Sometimes it’s the little victories, like depositing a dollar to avoid overdraw fees that make me feel like a responsible adult.
You can’t believe everything you hear, but you can repeat it.
If I rapped I would have to start doing way more stuff because only so many things rhyme with couch.
Is beer cheaper off the kids menu
All milk is breast milk.
It`s friday!! I smell vodka ;)
All the desirable things in life are either illegal, expensive or married.
Afraid of not getting what you ordered when online shopping…..Ha, try online dating
Liquid sanity: I call it alcohol..!!
You know you`ve reached adulthood when your bed is in the middle of the wall instead of in the corner.