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Million dollar idea: Duck Dynasty chia pets.
Taking shots of Tequila is just another way of saying, "I like where I wake up to always be a surprise."
There is no greater stress than the stress of a guy who forgot his phone & left it at home with his wife.
Single ? I`m not single, I`m in a long standin relationship with fun and freedom ! ;)
Who named them veterinarians and not "dogtors"?
According to my neighbor`s rooster, it`s 5am now. Also according to my neighbor`s rooster, we`re having fried chicken for dinner tomorrow.
Ever noticed how fast people walk across the road when you don`t apply the brakes
When my kids grow up, Iām going to their house to break their stuff, eat all their food, make a huge mess, say Iām bored & then just leave!
If you are going to call the cops every time you spot me in your bushes I don`t think this relationship is going to work.
I watched my first porn movie today. I looked so much younger back then...
If someone throws a rock at you, throw a flower back at them, but, make sure the flower is still in the pot..
I see you posted a photograph of snow with the caption "it`s cold" could you tell me more about that
I`m just looking for a reason not to drink
3 out of 4 Americans make up 75% of the population.
There was no bonus fry at the bottom of the bag. But the story has a happy ending. I found it later in my sports bra.