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I want a doorbell that makes the sound of someone knocking on the door.
I`m first world poor. That means I have a smart phone and laptop that I use to go online and see that I have no money in my bank account.
Always be yourself, unless you suck…and if you suck you should try being more like me.
i don`t know what to say on your comment so i just hit "like" so you won`t be upset that ignored you.
The problem with this generation boils down to this one thing: Their cartoons suck.
Drake isn`t even a rapper anymore. He`s an emotion, like "how are you doing today?" "idk im feeling kinda drake though"
I love when bill collectors ask if you can borrow the money...uh I did that before and I think we both know how that turned out.
Sometimes I STOP when it`s not even Hammer time
Time flies when you`re throwing watches.
I need my coffee before I start pretending to work.
Somewhere out there is a guy named Joe whose greatest achievement is that he was a really sloppy eater.
“we should hang out soon” loosely translates to I’m doing everything in my power to end this stupid conversation.
Have you ever wondered if Dora is smuggling drugs in her backpack?
This strip mall certainly is misleading And I probably should put my clothes back on now.
Apparently, my wife has friend zoned me...