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You know the fun part of your life is over when people around you are getting pregnant on purpose.
I do whatever the little voices tell me to do.
The weekend went by and I don’t remember any of it. That’s a good thing right?
You want to piss off a woman? Hide one shoe.
So you think you can study with your facebook activated? That`s cute! ^.^
Drinking: because why not intensify the feelings you`re trying to escape?
People who say 45 minutes past the hour must be the same ones who have kids 89 and 63 month olds
I’d be much more interested in meeting people if I didn’t think most people were idiots.
The bed is always the comfiest right at the time you are supposed to be getting out of it
I`m watching Godzilla tonight.... His parents asked me to babysit
I`m off to get my beauty sleep. Yeah, I know...I`m already so beautiful you can`t stand it! I promise...a little more isn`t lethal...yet! ;) Goodnight!
I get very annoyed when people mix up there, they`re and their. From now on I`m going to point it out, weather they like it or not.
That awkward moment when you take a bath in the middle of the day and don`t know whether to wear normal clothes or pajamas.
When I was a kid “The Server Is Down” meant your waiter was depressed.
Building the city on rock and roll was probably the wrong move from an engineering perspective.