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It only takes a few seconds to show someone how you feel about them......the police call it indecent exposure but whatever.
Funniest thing ever heard on TV. "Ward, you were a little hard on the Beaver last night"
I advise you...don`t mess with me, I know karate, kung fu,judo, tae kwon do, jujitsu, and 28 other dangerous words.
i love you with all my butt. i would say heart but my butt is bigger :)
If everything goes as planned, tonight I shall drink myself beautiful.
There 492 billionaires in the United States, and not one of those goddamned losers has decided to become Batman.
I can eat anything in the house unless it was specifically bought for my wife but the only way to know it`s for her is to eat it. Apparently
Why does whoop-ass only come in a can?
The filling in this fortune cookie tastes like paper...
Some people are such treasures that you really just wanna bury them.
Please don`t mistake my personality for flirting. Just because I`m awesome doesn`t mean I like you.
Is bloodletting still in use today? Just thinking...I know a couple of people here that may be in need of some bloodletting
FYI....just in case something happens.....The cashier at the liquor store down the street is my emergency contact person.
The best thing about weed is it teaches you that it`s okay to take 35 minutes to make a sandwich
Another year has passed. I`ve just about given up on the Mayans.