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That awkward moment when You accidentally hit the LIKE button During Facebook stalking.
The real trouble with reality is that there´s no background music
I know this will probably piss off a bunch of people I know, but what makes someone good at fishing?!? Seriously, all you did was wait longer.
Keep calm and drink on.
I poured some shampoo over my speakers today and they blew up... So much for EXTRA VOLUME.
I`ve been hiding from exercise. I`m in the fitness protection program.
You know what`s really great about being a narcissist? Me.
I love you more than I hate everyone else.
To-Do List: Nothing [?]
How did Mexico keep enough people from crossing the border to field a full soccer team?
Alcohol doesn`t make you fat, it makes you lean..........against tables, chairs, walls, and garbage cans.
Hey guy in the car behind me... Honking your horn isn`t going to help me type any faster.
Remember, children. The best way to get a puppy for Christmas is to beg for a baby brother.
Can anyone tell me how to become a illegal immigrant, their benefits are undeniably more superior to our own.
I`m so bitchy right now ... I won`t even talk to myself!!