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Looks like Waldo got on the malasian plane.. well played waldo.. well played..
Bring multiple sets of clothes to work, change every hour, and act like nothing’s different.
is available for rebound sex.
I`ll do whatever it takes to be the mistake you can`t live without
I’m too young to be too old for everything.
I just saw a guy with the Monster energy logo tattooed on his neck, so if your village is missing their idiot, we have him.
You can make up any word you want in conversation and if you use it in a dilsationary way, people rarely question the meaning.
My "check engine" light came on while driving to work this morning. I looked and the engine is still there...silly light.
I swear if my memory gets any worse, i`ll be able to plan my own surprise party.
A coworker just wrote "Retard" on the windshield of my car. It`s taken me over an hour to lick it off!
Take me seriously at your own risk.
My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember all the things I was suppose to do.
To all my friends who sent me best wishes for 2013, for 2014 could you please send money, alcohol or petrol vouchers…Cheers!
Sarcasm: because beating the sh!t out of people is illegal.
Friday. The golden child of the weekdays. The superhero of the workweek. The welcome wagon to the weekend. The famous F word we thank God for every week.