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I may contain scenes of violence, nudity and foul language.
I hate it when I`m in a crowded elevator and yell out "GROUP HUG!" and people look at me all weird and stuff.. Making friends is hard.
So far I`m 0 for 276 for walking around the block in hopes of finding a bag of money on the side of the road.
Ever since I installed Adblocker, I have been severely depressed. Hot singles in my area are no longer interested in me.
The only correct answer to "Are you ticklish?" is "I will kill you."
I`m lucky to be broke at a time when minimalism and sustainability are in style.
Being a vegetarian is hard at first but after a month or so you get used to telling everyone you`re a vegetarian.
I am one of those people who presses every button in the elevator when I`m getting out =]
I DON`T NEED ANYONE OR ANYTHING!!! (Except for Louie...the name I`ve given this meatball sub.)
Nobody on television curses more than the Roadrunner.
The buses don`t go where you live do they.
The most amazing thing about the internet is how it allows you, with the click of a few buttons, to do absolutely nothing with your life
received a call saying that my son had been lying in school, and was being expelled. I don´t have a son. That kid is one damn good liar.
is it too late to wrap myself up like a baby and drop myself off on a billionaire’s doorstep
My car broke down outside Pizza Hut last night. So I ordered a pizza to be delivered to my house and got a lift from the driver.