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I saw a piece of chewing gum in the urinal today and thought, boy that must have been really painful.
The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn`t for any religious reasons. They couldn`t find three wise men and a virgin.
Tonight, I`m bringing Sexy back! I just hope I don`t need a receipt...
Be good to your nieces and nephews. One day you`ll need them to smuggle alcohol into your nursing home.
I think a good gauge of my personality is that I watch Homeland to relax.
Scientist Proved That There are more Than 124786534688644478 People Living In This world who are Too Lazy To Read The Above Number...!!!
I was going to LIKE and compliment your FB pic, but I`m not a good liar.
I was raised on the streets is more manly than saying I grew up watching Sesame Street.
Do you think the inventor of the USB will be buried twice? The 2nd time because they put him in the wrong way?
Had a great time watching the family oriented PG rated Shrek with my grandson last night... until he asked why a Donkey would have sex with a Dragon.
And Jesus said, those footprints on the beach where two sets become one, that`s where I unfollowed you.
Hibernation should be a human thing too.
My IQ? ... With google or without?
Doing donuts in the parking lot sounds fun. Eating donuts in the parking lot sounds better.
Boomerangs can be quite dangerous if you`ve got alzheimers.