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Advantage #46 of being single. I have entire closets that are completely empty.
My New Years Resolution is to be less vain. It`s going to be difficult though, considering how sexy I am.
To say I wasted today would be a huge insult to the producers of the 3 movies I watched.
If you replace the "W" in "where" "what" and "when" with "T" you get answers to the questions.
If you`re going to have opinions on my life, then I am assuming you will be paying some of the bills.
Don`t you just a hate it when you stumble into bed drunk only to be nagged by someone screaming "Get out" or "You live next door!"
Some mornings I feel like leaving my coffee until its cold enough that I can just pour it directly into my eyes.
Any amusement you may have experienced from my past posts are in no way a guarantee of future performance.... Please initial here and sign here.
The older I get the earlier it gets late.
My favorite thing to say to old people is, "When I was your age I didn`t believe in reincarnation either".
Guys be like, "Lets play 21 question." Girl: Ok, what`s your favorite color? Boy: Triangle, so you a virgin?
Sarcasm is a dominant gene in my family.
I always found it a little counter productive when the teacher would say "Don`t get smart with me!"
My number was 0...
Avoid hangovers: stay drunk ;)