Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
If, in your relationship, you hear "You`re suffocating me", you`re probably not holding down the pillow hard enough.
Did you ever notice that the doctor’s bill is always a lot more readable than the doctor’s prescription?
"That`s crazy" is the perfect response when you haven`t been listening.
According to the law it`s not appropriate to put a bounty on my boss. I actually thought it showed great initiative and leadership.
good boys go to heaven bad boys go every where
Before meeting a hot chick, wish I could talk to the dude who`s sick of her bullsh!t.
If I ask my dad to take a picture of me with my phone there is a 99% chance it will be a video of me yelling "It`s the button on the left!"
I read my kids a few select facebook statuses before bed, kiss them on their heads, and whisper, "This is why we have to stay in school"
I get my cardio from caffeine...
The problem with today`s children is that today`s parents are idiots.
Struggling to get your wife`s attention?.....just sit down and look comfortable.
That one-day popularity on Facebook because it’s your birthday.
Do short people start their childhood stories with "when I was little", too?
How Big is Infinity?
I am a gentleman, based on the clubs I go to.