Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
The Hobbit 2: we`ve still got a long way to walk
I send more time looking for porn than actually watching it.
Every day is a struggle between wanting to lose weight and wanting to eat my weight in pizza.
Keep talking; someday you’ll say something intelligent.
They say when life gives you lemons….but what if life hands you a rather large banana? What then, my friend? What then?
Sometimes entire relationships can only be described as "that weird thing I did for a while."
Some people are just bad news!!! Those are my favorite!
If I look tired at the end of the day, it`s because I just spent eight solid hours looking busy.
Falling in love when lonely is a lot like shopping when hungry, you end up with a bunch of sh!t you don`t need.
Arguing over a girl`s bust size is like choosing between Molson, Heineken, Coors or Budweiser -- Men may state their preferences, but will grab whatever is available.
With great power comes a great electricity bill.
I walked briskly with scissors today. I’m pretty wild.
roses are red, violets are blue, I suck at poems.. you have nice boobs
Some of you are like family to me. I don’t want you calling me either.
The less you know, the more you think you do.