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I bet Waldo`s parents are worried sick.
It’s the getting ahead that I’m running behind on.
Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of Alcohol
No matter how old you are, an empty Christmas wrapping paper tube is still a light saber.
If you see someone wearing camouflage clothing, bump into them. It only takes a second of your time & it makes them feel like it works.
I hate that they put "use by" dates on condoms... like I`m not under enough pressure trying to get laid already.
If there`s one thing in this world that everyone can agree on it`s... "Goonies never say die!"
Married men should forget their mistakes. There is no need for two people, to remember the same thing.
My New Years resolution is to be more assertive if that`s okay with you guys?
Sorry I`m late. I had five cups of coffee and became convinced I could probably bend a fork with my mind, so I had to give it an honest try.
Not one back to school special on beer. What kind of world do we live in.
Girls are a lot like oceans, beautiful and deep, but once a month, it`s shark week.
Last person to like this wins a prize.
I don`t let my friends do stupid things... ALONE
You know you are desperate for an answer when you look at the second page of Google.