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FITNESS TIP: Set a regular gym schedule that`s easy to keep up with. For example, I work out once every 4 years after I vote for president.
Facebook would be much more interesting if they let you decide, which part of the body you wanna Poke.
I didn´t outsmart you. You just outdumbed me.
My son just accused me of making stuff up. I wouldn`t mind but I don`t even have any children!
DO NOT LIKE THIS… Unless you’re a sexy beast.
This year for Lent I`m giving up hanging out with all the people who gave up drinking for Lent.
Do you ever get up in the morning and look in the mirror and say, "that can`t be right"?
FACEBOOK STORY: Add as friend – Approve -> Write something on wall -Intro – Everyday chatting – Ask number phone – Messaging – Calling – Meeting – Express love – Make relationship status – Hangout – Misunderstanding – Fight – Break up – Unfriend – Block !THE END
If I`ve offended you in the past, please accept my apology, and shove it up your a$$.
I`m kinda like an onion, not in some deep I have layers way, but if you see me naked, you`ll cry.
Likes doing tokyo drifts with the shopping carts when I round the corner of each isle at Walmart.
I suffer from premature procrastination. It’s when you procrastinate before even receiving a task.
Apparently a teen in Brazil died after jerking off 42 times without stopping. So incase you were wondering. ...41, guys,...that`s the limit.
People who peel the entire banana before eating it must be the same ones who take off all their clothes to go to the bathroom.
I have good taste, I just don`t have the money to prove it.