Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Chuck-E-Cheese, because it`s never too early to introduce your child to poor nutrition and gambling..
I hope I’m the last guy on earth — I wanna see if all those women were lying to me.
I just took a 5 hour energy and a sleeping pill...LET THE BATTLE BEGIN.
Some people just need sympathetic pat.........on the head........with a hammer
Toilets are really just fart amplifiers when you are trying to be quiet.
There’s always that one person that catches you doing something weird.
I wonder how often I’ve narrowly avoided death without even noticing.
make little things count. teach midgets math.
Dating someone based only on looks is so shallow. Consider other things, like, do they have a lot of money.
I`ve said it before and I`ll say it again, if you drive a Nissan but don`t call it Liam then what is even the point of you
A fun thing to do is comment "that ain`t the girl you were with at the bar the other night" on all my married friends Facebook family photos
Since they`re loud and heavily scented already, Abercrombie & Fitch stores really are the ideal spot to go fart.
I don’t mind going to work. It’s that eight-hour wait to go home that bugs me.
Today is boozeday, I mean Tuesday...same difference!
All these years and I still don`t understand why they didn`t put Kevin Bacon in Grease.