Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Please ignore this post, I`m pretending to be adding a coworker`s phone number.
Years ago, my girlfriend said, “It’s me or the beer!” I wonder how she doing…
My ex-girlfriend owned a parakeet... Oh my god, that f**king thing would never shut up. But the bird was cool.
You can pretty much text anything as long as you put a happy face emoticon afterwards. You`re a slut :)
All I`m saying is, China could have a much better relationship with the West if they shared their dragons with us. But, whatever, be that way.
Barbie has an awful lot of things for a girl who`s knees don`t bend.
Don`t forget to get offended today by some retarded sh!t that has absolutely no bearing on your life whatsoever.
I don`t always say `oops`, but when I do, it`s usually ten minutes after I have a brilliant idea.
I`m scared of the pesticides on this produce, so I guess I`ll run them under cold water for half a second
I`m having a problem in Call Of Duty, I go to the menu and... ok by now the girls have stopped reading this, anyone know any good porn sites?
Can we just call it Zealand now? How long has it been? Move on people.
eHarmony matched me with a bean bag chair with duct tape on it
it`s friday o clock
I`m motivated by a need to leave something meaningful in the world & a profound desire to shove it in the face of anyone who`s rejected me.
I refuse to celebrate Earth Day until Wind & Fire are recognized.