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Of course size matters. No one wants a small pizza
I want a firsthand test of the "mo money, mo problems" hypothesis.
I`m so ghetto.... I had lights and water bill in my name before the age of 3..
I don`t know if I should tip the bathroom attendant, or charge for letting him watch...
I`ve said it before and I`ll say it again, if you drive a Nissan but don`t call it Liam then what is even the point of you
Adding “and sh!t” to the end of a sentence to make it sound cooler and sh!t.
You don’t truly know someone until you see how they react to their bag of chips getting stuck in a vending machine
Not to brag, but I’m pretty good in bed. I don’t snore or steal covers, and I only pee if something startles me.
i make the other half of the Oreo watch.
The Theory of Relativity: Time moves more slowly when you are with your relatives.
When I have to make a difficult decision in life I think what would grandma do, then I leave home in my nightie & shout at random strangers.
Think about how much more stressful life`s most stressful moments would be if accompanied by the running-out-of-time music in Mario Bros.
That mind-blowing moment when you realize chores were really the crap your parents didn’t want to do.
Sometimes I want to comment on a photo on Facebook but then I don’t wanna have to explain why I’m in your ‘Random Party Pics 08' album at 4am.
The greatest fear is NOT fear itself. It’s dropping your phone in a port-a-potty!