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Balloons think they’re so cool. I tried to tell one he was leaking and he just said, “Pfft.”
When I want to trim down my friend`s Facebook list I give my opinion and let nature do the rest.
Perhaps Voldemort’s face is flat because he ran into the wrong wall at the train station.
I took a sexual harassment course this afternoon.... I think I am going to be pretty good at it.
I`d like to be poor for a day, because being poor everyday gets to be real annoying after awhile.
pumpkin for sale, slightly used
DID YOU KNOW: If every person on the planet lined up along the Earth`s equator, most of them would drown.
Don`t pick on Aquaman! The crime rate underwater is pretty damn low the last time I checked.
I`m not sure how many problems I have because math is one of them.
I got a Rolex for my birthday from my lesbian friends. I think they misunderstood me when I said I wanna watch.
It`s not too late to start convincing our children that the world really did end in 2012 and we`re the survivors.
I didn’t get the job… heading home.. Good Bye Rome.. until we meet again.
If you can`t handle me at my worst I completely understand, because I can`t either.
Have you ever loved someone so much, you wanted to keep them hidden from the world and all to yourself? Well, apparently its called kidnapping
The person next to me just farted.. Does this mean my lungs are full of his poo particles -.-