Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Sorry I got drunk and said and did everything I wanted to say and do.
I will write something profound ... subsoil!
ATM is telling me I have insufficient funds. Worst part is I was just walking by minding my own business.
Please, Lord, let me prove that winning the lottery won´t spoil me.
Why is it called stealing when your WIFI is trespassing in my house?
I love it when the person’s laugh is funnier than the actual joke.
I did not trip...the floor looked like it needed a hug.
I mean really though...Why wash cups when you can just drink out of the jug?
Ever update an app and realize the "fixed issues" were all a lie and it will never be the same? That`s what going back to an ex is like.
Ahhh..Sunday..the biggest decision of the day...to bathe or not to bathe.
You know it`s time to delete Facebook when your mom, dad, uncles, aunties, grandparents etc... is on it.
Lets watch a reality show about nasty rednecks acting like rednecks, but get mad when one of them says something a redneck would say
Four words that I never want to hear: There is no food
We`ll be friends `til we`re old and senile ... Then we`ll be new friends.
Is it physically possible to be sad in rollerskates? Cause I think my cat`s just being dramatic.