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Click Like, if you hate being told what to do.
I donate blood 5 times a year just so I`m less and less related to some of my relatives.
I wouldn’t have to manage my anger, if people could learn to manage their stupidity.
The black sheep always have the best stories.
I`m not really much of a plumber, but I have laid some pipe before.
You guys remember back before Google when we would just sit around and wonder about sh!t ...?
There really should be awards for getting out of bed.
Girls probably spend more time thinking about what men think than men actually spend thinking.
whenever i`m bored I just expect at any moment for the Koolaid man to break through my wall and take me on a deliciously refreshing adventure!
I`m such a thrill seeker, when I see a ‘Caution, Wet Floor’ sign, I walk faster...
I like when google answers my stupid questions because it means I`m not the only one asking google stupid questions.
I’m not high maintenance, but rather precious cargo with lavish instruction for upkeep.
I should be ashamed of myself. Lets be clear, I`m not. But I should be.
Friday Night Inspirational Message: You miss 100% of the shots you don`t drink.
My girlfriend told me she wanted me to surprise her with a gift that will take her breath away. I’m thinking about getting her a treadmill.