Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I wonder what "don`t touch" is in Braille.
Holiday Shopping Tip #112:Next time you see someone with their arms full of bags looking around a parking lot while pointing and clicking their horn button, help them out and start pushing your horn button too!
Dear Mother-in-Law, Do not tell me how to handle my child, I am living with one of yours and he needs a lot of improvement.
Whatever you do in life, always give 100%…unless you’re donating blood…
Went to the bookstore to pick up a "Where`s Waldo" book today, but couldn`t find any. Well played Waldo, well played...
I`m not sure what my spirit animal is, but I`m sure it has Rabies.
there are so many scams on the internet now...... Send me $19.95 an I`ll tell you how you can avoid them
"Everybody freeze!" -December
I love water. Especially when it`s frozen and surrounded by vodka.
I`m for driverless cars, but honestly, having to drive is the only thing standing in the way of me being a complete drunk piece of sh!t 24/7
You will attract attention if wearing a skirt on a windy day. This is doubly true if you are a man.
Capitalization can really change a sentence. Example: I love to eat candy ... I love to eat capitalization.
No, I don`t need a Fitbit. I can count to 45 by myself.
I`m always right. And when I`m not, I edit Wikipedia.
It`s weird how many people at my office are named "Hey."