Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Do you know what would really be fun? ... No really.. If you know, tell me.. I`m bored to death.
Playing Frisbee with a five year old is amazingly similar to just running after a Frisbee.
I think its nice my vacuum cleaner has head lights. Just in case I wanna wake up in the middle of the night and clean in the dark, or wake up my dog making him think heβs getting hit by a
My internet goes out more than I do.
Wish my husband got a check from the NFL for all the refereeing he does from his recliner...
Trust me when I say anyone can dance! - Jack Daniels
I like that CNN is tweeting a picture of ebola bacteria. It will be handy in case I encounter it in the wild. With my microscope vision.
Has marriage been on Mythbusters yet?
I should never have climbed into this vat of curdled milk. I`m in whey over my head.
If Tetris has taught me anything it`s that errors pile up and accomplishments disappear.
I love sleep ... itβs like a Time Machine to Breakfast.
Life`s short ... Drink fast
Dear whoever ate my fries while I was in the ball pit at McDonalds... Not funny, grow up.
You can get away with farting at the zoo because you can always blame the animals...
Odd Fact: The names of characters in Inception are: Dom, Robert, Eames, Arthur, Mal and Saito. Note the first letters = DREAMS.