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Maybe my goal was to be a 35 year old loser on the Internet ... You don`t know.
String cheese is the sexiest of the cheeses. It’s like you get to undress it.
Helpful Tip : The police never think it`s as funny as you do.
Don`t ``Wine and dine`` me ... ``Champagne`` me ... step it up a notch
I still remember the first time I lied about being able to time travel... It was 3 weeks from tomorrow.
From now on, I will be replacing the word `sh*t` with `sugar` in my facebook statuses, so that I don`t come across as being so f*cking vulgar all the time.
I get my cardio from caffeine...
It`s always quiet on here at the weekends, it`s like you people have lives or something...
I`m more of a "the glass is half shattered into a million tiny pieces" person.
Ghetto word of the day: "Bishop", My girlfriend fell down, So I picked that bishop.
If you watched the story of my life backwards, you`d see an incredibly inspirational story about hair growth, weight loss, and vastly improved athletic ability.
They`re all cop cars when you`re this high.
My last thought in life will probably be ” I wonder what happens if I touch this?”
roes are red violets are blue he`s for me not for you if for any chance you`ll take my place i`ll use my fist and smash your face
It`s spooky how many kids look like their owners.