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They might want to put a picture of that airplane on a milk carton.
I don`t hate you. I just hope your next period happens while you`re in a shark tank!
does anyone know if smurfs are gluten free
MAY` contain nudity? Either it does or it doesn`t. DON`T WASTE MY TIME
Never piss off a woman on her period...scratch that...Never piss off a woman, period.
Please just put it in the fridge.... We`ll throw it away next week.
"Bros before hoes" is something a bro without a hoe would say.
Guys would stay home longer if boobs came in a 30 pack.
I think it`s about time Taylor Swift wrote a song called "Maybe I`m the Problem"
Do you think the dude that invented the breathalyzer has any friends left?
Buying my wife a matching belt and bag for her birthday. We`ll have that vacuum cleaner working in no time.
Just made eye contact with a guy while licking my lips ... I think I need to kill him now.
My most heavily used kitchen appliance is a fire extinguisher.
I`m glad I don`t work in an office. I can only imagine the smell at lunch time when everybody opens their egg salad sandwiches today.
We should be thanking our Dads for bringing us into the world, not our Moms. She probably wasn`t in the mood...