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You never really know how many inches you`re gonna get or how long it`ll last. Snow, maybe.
My greatest fear is that I will accidentally use the status update bar as the search bar on my browser.
OK. Who decided to call it "possession of marijuana" and not "joint custody"?
So far I’ve spent most of 2016 flipping off the weather channel.
Sunglasses allow you to stare at people without getting caught. It`s like facebook in real life.
What do people do with all the extra time they save by writing ”K” instead of ”OK”?
I would be so pissed if someone shook me all night long.
I`m easily influenced... That`s why I try not to watch too much porn
I don`t get enough credit for not going on killing sprees.
bored out of my mind in class i began staring into space... space happened to be right in front of me at the time...
You know you had a good night when your first call the next morning is from the bank making sure your card wasn’t stolen.
Here’s a little bit of advice for you.. advi
If you give up smoking, drinking, and sex, you don’t live longer, just seems longer.
On the plus side of 2017, the use of the words `awesomesauce` and `amazeballs` were at an all time low.
You know you are in the hood when your portable GPS says “Drive faster and put me under the seat.”