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If you don`t have anything nice to say I would probably enjoy spending time with you
Sometimes I think if it weren`t for the gutter my mind would be homeless...
I propose a toast to the booze for making life seem tolerable.
Work is the result of failing to procrastinate effectively.
My friend told me he wants to be a secret agent. Based on that alone, I don`t think he`d be a good secret agent.
But what if bygones want to be something else? ;)
So many idiots, so few nuclear warheads....
why would you go outside? that`s where bugs live
The worst job to have right about now would be that of a realtor in Ferguson.
There is no life on earth without water. Because without water, there is no coffee. And without coffee, I`ll kill you all.
I don`t work that hard, I just make everything look way more difficulat than it is...
Is it the S or the C that`s silent in scent?
No thank you.No thank you.No thank you.No thank you.No thank you.No thank you.No thank you.No thank you. I just want the oil change
You think having periods is hard? ... Try being on a 24 hour killstreak on Call of Duty with itchy balls.
Wonders why thereΒ΄s an ice cream truck for kids but not a frozen Margaurita truck for adults?