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why earn money when it comes easier when you just ask
Super Bowl Sunday, the one day of the year that DVR`s are used to watch commercials, instead of skip them!
The only way you can be right in an argument with a woman is by admitting you`re wrong.
This day needs more tomfoolery!
Dodgeball, but with random people who don`t know that they are playing..............
The worst thing about finding out Santa isn`t real is that you realise it was your parents who were to blame for all the terrible presents
Gaining weight while you owe me money is a sign of disrespect
Apparently, I just ate 39 servings of Tic - Tacs.
People who go rock climbing: you know you don`t have to, right
Statistically: 1 in 7 dwarfs are grumpy
A trail of clothes leading to my bedroom means that I dropped them on the way from the dryer ... That`s all.
My date is in 2 hours, which means I have very little time to fix my glasses and fix my bangs and get a career and lose 50 pounds
Ladies, stop looking for a guy to sweep you off your feet. Sweeping is your job
I don`t know why it`s necessary to get a glass dirty, when wine tastes perfectly fine straight out of the bottle.
Trouble is just fun you got caught having.