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Ok but how old is your child in minutes?
I’m at Code 5 today. I don’t know. It’s something this lady in the coffee shop said and I liked it. So now I’m using it, too.
I hate the snow so much, I want to build a snowman just so I can punch it in its face.
Lightning bugs use their blinkers more than most drivers.
I always tell new hires, don`t think of me as your boss, think of me as your friend who can fire you`re ass
Mondays aren`t so bad... it`s my job that sucks.
I`ll just admire you from afar.. Or 500ft. That`s what this paper says.
Haiku`s confuse me / Too often they make no sense / Hand me the pliers
Yes I walked away mid-conversation. You were boring me to death and my survival instincts kicked in
I swear I saw a guy earlier today that had no chin and all I could think about was, how does he put on pillow cases?
Hopefully because of social networking, I`ve tarnished my reputation enough for anybody to ever place me in a role of great responsibility.
Can I tell you how terribly grateful I am that no one had cell phones, iPads or digital cameras when I had to squaredance in P.E.
I just want to point out that I am an Amazon Prime member so it`s about time you guys started treating me with a little respect.
The voices in my head may not be real, but they have some good ideas!
Scariest Moment: Flushing the toilet at someone else’s house, and seeing the water rise…